Can you spell cacophony?

What does the man do when the whole world collapses?
There was a foundation, now gone
Sure and sturdy is was, unmovable and firm
Now nothing more than vapour

For years it had been built upon
Room by room, brick upon brick
With the slab covered by builder’s guarantee
He took care with every extension

But was it just imagined? Was it ever really there?
His own wishful thinking made flesh?
Or piece by piece, day by day was that flesh eaten away
Until the world was left on dirt

So now he is holding up the walls, fighting the shifting sands
That fight all that is left
“My house still stands”, he screams to any who would hear
“For how long?”, he keeps to himself

Those who could be holding up the walls, inside and out
Are now the demolition contractors
“It is far too late to stop”, they say
And they make plans for the fall

So all alone, he watches the walls come crashing down
The house once loved, now despised
Crocodile tears shed for the demise of that grand old place
And the remains of the one who would not leave

I read this on the [ABC news site][1] today:

> So-called hate crimes are on the rise, with dozens killed in racially motivated attacks so far this year.

Now I know this is a very serious issue (especially for those belonging to minorities in Russia) but I couldn’t hold back a snigger when I remembered hate crimes in [Life on Mars][2]:

>Sam Tyler: I think we need to explore whether this attempted murder was a hate crime.
Gene Hunt: What as opposed to one of those I-really-really-like-you sort of murders?

[1]: http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2008/10/07/2383780.htm
[2]: http://www.bbc.co.uk/lifeonmars/

Look at the comments I have to put up with from some of the young women that I work with at the pharmacy.

*”Led Zeppelin, Who are they?”*

*”Who’s Captain Kirk?”*

*”What’s a TARDIS?”*

*Blank Look*, when I said “Hope I die before I get old”

As unfortunate as all of the above are, a sign of what I call *Cultural Illiteracy*, they are nothing compared to this:

*”Julius Caesar, isn’t he an actor?”*

AARGH! Western Culture is (by definition) that which traces its routes to Rome. Given that Julius is (as I heard him described recently) “the most famous Roman”, what hope do we have when these (near to) 20 year olds, recently finished school, **haven’t even heard of him!!**

Yes I am. I admit it.

Now, I may have sent you a link to this post due to some unfortunate lapse firstly in your grammar and secondly in my manners. I’ll apologise for the latter now while I am thinking more calmly and clearly. As for the former, hopefully despite my rudeness you might learn something.

My particular pet hate is the Terror of the Unwanted Apostophe. My good friend Bob The Angry Flower has something to say about that.

If you are still unsure about how to use your apostrophes, wikihow has a slightly more polite guide.

Another issue I am coming to grips with currently is the whole “writing then when I really mean than“. When I first started seeing it, I just put it down to typos but it is happening more and more and all the time. I still don’t understand it. I can even understand how some people get apostrophes wrong, but this makes no sense. Wikihow also has an article about this issue and I suppose it clears things up a bit, but really!?

Then = time, than = comparison. How do you get them mixed up?

At work at [the pharmacy][1] today, we had one of those incidents where you wonder if you are on the same planet as everyone else. Details have been removed for obvious reasons.

A lady presenting a prescription was asked “Have we done prescriptions for you before?” to which said lady replies “Yes, I come here all the time.” Clearly one of our *regular customers*!

I dispense prescription, noticing at the time that we have done one (yes, one. Less than two, more than zero) prescription for her in the past. One.

As one of the pharmacy assistants said later, it is good that all of our regular customers are not like that, we would have all lost our jobs years ago!

Clearly, “all the time” == “at least once”.

Reminds me of the language problems I have with my children, where “we **never** do …. (substitute favourite activity or food)” is equivalent to “we haven’t done (activity) for at least a day”.

[1]: http://castletownchemist.com